Alas, I have not been the best vipassana meditator. As is my pattern in life, attempting to put forth a rigorous structure instantly brings forth all manner of challenges to tamper with and disable that structure. The old habit patterns of the mind are strong indeed, reaching beyond what is within my control to influence the external reality. Changing this into a more positive ritual is a great work, as I believe it will have repercussions beyond my waking world.
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I've still managed to sit every day for at least 30 minutes, but I feel the determination slipping away, driven by the distractions of material life, work, bills, chores, social obligations. And then there's the incessant chattering of my own mind, now that's it had a break, it returns with a cacophonous din that is difficult to quiet. But I'm making excuses for my lack of effort, these are the merely the issues at hand which interfere with my practice.
be well all,
Sean
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